I'm no longer invested in my own demise
I used to wear my burnout like a badge of honor.
The unexpected gift that quarantine gave me (besides Tiger King) was the realization that I can do my job from home, and I was much happier than I was at work. I saw for the first time that there was another way than what I had been doing.
I learned to cherish the quiet and be comfortable in my own company. I reconnected to what I truly value: quality time with the people I love most and being creative.
I was conditioned to link my worth to my productivity. Hustle culture was overwhelming me. It was so deeply ingrained that I never gave it a second thought until my daily routines were interrupted by the 2020 dumpster fire.
This lesson was hard to learn.
I fiercely held on to the idea that things would get back to normal and I would be able to dive back into the hustle.
As the way I spent my days shifted, I realized that I had been living a life that was completely for others. I was chasing the next achievement so that I could finally feel like I earned my place in the world.
The problem was that I never enjoyed any of my accomplishments.
I set a new lofty goal just as I was about to reach the previous one because I was seeking validation from others. If I wasn’t out in the world, trying to live a perfect life, who was I?
Does this sound familiar?
You run into a friend at the grocery store (because you don’t have time to connect on purpose) and they ask how you are.
You say, “OMG I’m so busy!”
Then they try to one-up you with all the craziness in their life. It turns into some sort of twisted contest to see who is running themselves into the ground more quickly.
I’m done with that.
In a society that monetizes your time and expects you to pull yourself up by your bootstraps, the most rebellious thing you can do is rest.
If you are done with hustle culture too, here are some ways that you can stick it to the man and be the rebel you never knew you wanted to be.
Rest
This is simple, but it’s not easy.
One of the biggest anxiety attacks I have ever had was triggered by taking time off. I had two whole days home alone and I vowed to myself that I was going to just relax.
The problem was, I was overcome by guilt. If I wasn’t working, cleaning, or constantly improving, what was I doing? Why couldn’t I just do nothing? When I wasn’t distracted by taking care of other people or proving my value through work, I didn’t know what to do with myself.
My therapist gave me an amazing tip: set a timer to rest and do something enjoyable. Two days was too much. She suggested I start with 30 minutes. I took her advice and now I am proud to say that my rest muscle is developing nicely.
When you are well rested you are more productive. You have the energy you need to put into the projects that are truly important
Say No
How many extra projects have you taken on in a misguided attempt to make yourself indispensable? I used to volunteer for every committee and event that came up. I felt guilty if I didn’t.
What I understand now is that all of those extra things didn’t make me more valuable to anyone else. They made me resentful and justified a martyr complex that kept me stuck in a burnout cycle.
When you say no to things you don’t want to do, your yes increases in value a hundredfold. When you say yes, it’s because you want to contribute. I’ll take an enthusiastic yes over a resentful one any day. How about you?
When you have clear boundaries around your time, you can kick ass at the things you care about most.
Normalize Unscheduled Time
I dare you to give the middle finger to hustle culture by celebrating your latest Netflix binge on social media. This rebellion needs folks who are willing to publicly relax.
Not in a “work hard, play hard” kind of way. More of an “I’m a human being worthy of rest” kind of way.
Experiment with the breathing room that white space on your calendar gives you. Allow yourself to be in the moment and do something that feels like a pleasure instead of overthinking what you should be doing.
Maybe you feel like taking a walk. Maybe it’s journaling, or roller skating, or crocheting. Whatever it is, just do it without judging yourself.
When you have time to think and slow down, you can organize your thoughts and prioritize your tasks without the pressure of a cramped calendar.
Trigger People
Trust me, when you join the hustle culture rebellion you will trigger people. When you refuse to enter the toxic contest for the crown of burnout royalty, there will be people who judge you.
Their opinions are none of your business.
You know what is true for you.
Find some compassion for them because they are still card-carrying members of the hustle club and you were there once too. You know how exhausting it is. You’re modeling a new way of doing things and it’s ok if other people aren’t quite ready to join you.
The next time you run into a friend at the grocery store, tell them about how chill your life is. Let’s be adult rebels and prioritize rest, pleasure, and play!
Wanna stay in touch? I send out an email newsletter with journal prompts and reflection questions at each new moon and full moon. Plus, I will give you my Self-Care Menu PDF as a little bonus.
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